"To Forgive or Not To Forgive"
Unforgiveness will prevent us from living the abundant, or the plentiful and rich, life that Christ has planned for us! We rob OURSELVES of peace of mind when we refuse to forgive! Why not obey God’s Word and let go of all the pain and hurt from the past? Holding on to it only holds us up from blossoming into the man or woman of God that we have been created to become!
Forgiveness is something that I have personally struggled with for many years. I failed to realize that my unwillingness to let go of the past had transformed me into an unhappy and bitter person. This had become a stronghold for me and resulted in me constantly spewing out negative responses, developing a wall of defense that many people interpreted as meanness, and becoming withdrawn. I was living a life of misery because I allowed the foolish actions of other people, that I could not seem to overcome, t hold me in a mental and emotional prison.
I reached a point in my life that I was tired of being miserable so I turned to the only person that was able to genuinely show me the root cause of my unhappiness, and that person was God. I began to pray and God began to show me my heart. I must admit that it was not a pretty sight. I realized that my main problem is that I never recovered from what was said and done to me since I was as young as 10 years of age. I bore these pains and injustices well into my mid 30’s until I realized that they were much too heavy for me to continue carry. For my spiritual, mental, and emotional sake, I concluded that I needed to release them once and for all.
Perhaps something that I have shared with you thus far has hit home, and you realize that you are in the same position that I was once in, and you realize that you need to forgive and move on with your life. The challenge now is HOW do you forgive when you have been so deeply wounded and offended?
Below are some steps that I took, that I know if you approach in faith will also help you on your journey to healing:
Specifically pray on a daily basis and ask God to help you to forgive
the person(s) that has wronged you. Tell Him how the person made you feel and how it has affected your life up until this point. Be honest with God that your flesh does NOT want to forgive the person, but you desire to obey His Word. Whatever you do... DO NOT hold back in prayer. Be completely transparent and honest with God about the wounds in your spirit and the brokenness of your heart. Allow the tears to flow. The feelings of hurt and even rage will rise to the surface, but commit to leaving those feelings at the altar of prayer.
Incorporate Psalms 51:10 into your prayer on daily basis, “Create in
me a clean heart , O God; and renew a right spirit within me.” Ask God to create and renew in you a perpetual heart and spirit of forgiveness. Ask him to remove from you a spirit to hold grudges and to house bitterness and anger.
Read Scriptures about forgiveness and mediate on them on a daily
basis. Commit them to memory and rehearse them in your heart. Below are some references to assist you:
2 Corinthians 5:18-19
2 Corinthians 2:5-8
Seek professional godly Christian counseling and or coaching from a
Spirit led individual that can help to birth you through the healing and forgiveness process. Surround yourself with positive and godly people that will not facilitate or tolerate a spirit of unforgiveness operating in you.
I implore you to make the decision today to forgive. Forgiveness is like a laxative. When you digest it, it will cause all of the accumulated waste that is comprised of anger, grudges, pain, bitterness, and strife to be released out of your life and will result in your ability to move freely without sluggishness or discomfort. Forgiveness not only frees you, but it unties God’s hands so that He can begin to tear down what needs to be torn down and build up what needs to be built up in your life. Choose today to obey God’s instructions to forgive and watch Him move in your life like never before.
Author Sherabim Joy "Mema's Pretty Little Black Girls" 'Manny & The Magic Keys"
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